I never feel like the hilarity of visual jokes comes across in sketches. This is another one of those whose joke is entirely visual. Just picturing a bicycle built for two careening down... well, I won't spoil it (in case someone actually reads this). I guess this one is sort of like an SNL Digital Short in that there aren't any jokes until the very end. This one probably would work better in a movie or television show, but I still think it's funny on its own. Hey, have fun reading it!
EXT. SARAH'S HOME - NIGHT
Evan arrives at Sarah's home dressed in a suit and tie and holding flowers. He rings the doorbell. After a moment, Sarah answers the door in a nice dress. She smiles as she answers.
SARAH
Evan, right?
EVAN
That's right. Sarah?
SARAH
That's me.
Evan hands over the flowers. Sarah takes them and smells them.
EVAN
These are for you.
SARAH
Oh, thank you so much, you shouldn't have.
EVAN
It was nothing.
SARAH
You know, I was a little skeptical about this whole "blind date" thing, but you're off to a great start, mister!
They both chuckle. Evan offers his arm to her.
EVAN
Shall we?
SARAH
(impressed)
Oh my, a true gentleman!
EVAN
Yes, ma'am.
She takes his arm and they walk down to the car.
Fade to:
INT. FANCY RESTAURANT - NIGHT
Sarah and Evan enjoy dinner at an upscale, five-star restaurant. They chat inaudibly. Classical string music plays softly in the background combined with ambient restaurant noise. They are both smiling and laughing a lot, they are having a great time. The music continues as they finish their meal. Evan stands and helps Sarah out of her seat. They exit the restaurant.
Fade to:
EXT. PARK - NIGHT
Sarah and Evan walk through the park arm-in-arm. Both are smiling. It's obvious from their body language that they both have taken a liking to one another.
SARAH
You know, I have to say... This has really been the perfect evening.
EVAN
I feel the same way.
They turn and smile at each other and share a small kiss before continuing on, holding each other slightly closer now. They quickly come across a man in the park running a bicycle rental station. He has both regular bikes and bicycles built for two.
SARAH
Oh, look! Bicycles built for two!
EVAN
You want to go for a ride?
SARAH
Oh, that would be so romantic!
EVAN
Then let's go.
They approach the station.
Cut to:
EXT. PARK - NIGHT
Sarah and Evan now ride through the park on the bicycle built for two. Evan is steering. He's having a little trouble with it, the bike is wobbling all over the place. Both Sarah and Evan are laughing and having fun. As they ride, we can see that they are getting pretty close to the nearby city streets.
EVAN
Who knew this would be so hard?
SARAH
I've never ridden one of these before, this is crazy!
Evan, still having trouble with steering the bike, has basically lost control at this point. The bike is very clearly heading for the nearby four-lane street. Sarah sees this and looks half-concerned, half-amused.
SARAH
(nervous)
Ha, we better not get too far over there!
Evan is struggling hardcore at this point.
EVAN
Gah, lemme just...
Evan has lost control. The bike is definitely headed for the road as they get closer and closer to it.
SARAH
Evan, please!
EVAN
Oh no!
The bicycle rides over the sidewalk, off the curb, and into the street. Evan manically tries to steer the bike across the street as oncoming traffic swerves around him. Sarah is full-on screaming at this point and pedaling for her life.
SARAH
OH MY GOD!
Evan continues to steer, Sarah continues to scream and pedal, cars continues to screech, swerve, and honk. After a good ten seconds of out-and-out panic, they actually somehow manage to make it all the way across the street without getting hit.
SARAH
(panic/fear)
Oh my God!
Sarah's screaming dies down as she realizes that they're safe.
SARAH
(slowly realizing)
Oh my... God... We made it! HAHA, we made it!
Evan breathes a deep sigh of relief. The bicycle continues on.
EVAN
Oh wow, that was unbelievable.
He turns his head to check on Sarah.
EVAN
Are you okay--
The bicycle suddenly, and unforeseen by anyone, heads down the entry to a subway station on a loud and violently bumpy descent. We only see Evan and Sarah disappear into the station on their bicycle built for two.
Fade to black.
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